Gingerbread House

My cousin Wendy sent us a care package with some surprises in there which we enjoyed immensely. Among the surprises was a gingerbread house kit. We hadn't had a chance to try it until today.

This morning was a dreary, rainy morning so I decided to occupy Ava with decorating the gingerbread house. The house came already assembled (thank goodness!) with all the candies, icing, and fondant for decoration. It also came with instructions on how to decorate in three different ways. I've never decorated a cake, much less a gingerbread house so when doing something for the first time, I have a tendency to follow rules. So, I chose one way to decorate and we set to work. I instructed Ava on how to put on the tiny candy bordering the door that I'd just iced and she was ignoring me and doing her own thing. The door was getting randomly covered by little candy dots, completely unlike the picture in the booklet. That wasn't in the instructions! I was getting annoyed. Ava began to play with the different candies, making a mess. The icing bag and decorating tip were not cooperating. I got frustrated and barked at Ava to stop playing and decorate exactly as I say. 

Ava dropped her head and said, "I'm sad."

Me: "What's wrong, baby? Why are you sad?"

Ava: "I don't like angry."

Me: (gulping as my heart contracted painfully) "I'm sorry, Ava." Big hug and a kiss.

Then I thought, why are you being such a perfectionist? It's just a gingerbread house and who cares if it doesn't look like the picture in the booklet? Ava isn't having fun! I'd unconsciously responded to the pressure of following directions, expecting to achieve perfection as a result. I am a product of America.

So, I threw that out of the window and began to slather the gingerbread house generously with icing and told Ava to decorate however she wanted. She gleefully started sticking gumdrops and candies all over the rooftop, all the while popping some into her mouth and licking the icing off with a finger.

Within minutes, she was singing, a sure sign of happiness. 

I make a lot of mistakes as a mommy. One hope is that I can realize it, stop in my tracks, and change course. I was luckily able to do that this morning and Ava enjoyed herself immensely as a result. Memories are being made here, not perfection. 

Pictures of Ava and the gingerbread house will follow.